May 2004

I wasn’t sure what to expect gastronomically from my pilgrimage to Scotland. I had hoped there would be some form of cuisine that was not saturated in starch (this was the land of the deep-fried Mars bar, after all). What I did not expect to find was a talented Italian cook. His name is Archibald Clark, and he is, in his own words, my mad, mental, Celtic cousin. Archie is the kind of person who will very comfortably speak his mind with little concern for the impact of the truth on others. I took to him immediately. His effusive charm…

I knew it would be a challenge to maintain my low-carb regimen while in Scotland, especially given that most menus comprise battered protein and starch with a side of peas. However, I was not about to blow a 13-lb. weight loss. At least, this was my frame of mind before I discovered the glory of fish and chips. Since returning from my trip, I have decided that I will never again eat this dish anywhere but in Scotland. Not only will this ensure dedication to my regimen, but it will guarantee that my vision of the perfect fried combination will…